Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
