I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
