You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
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