I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize