Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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