i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
