is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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