just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
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she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
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Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
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