Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Green mimosas i think yes
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
