LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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