You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
