and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
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