He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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