His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize
