she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize