I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
God I need to hump something, right now.
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