She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
They have beer where we have blood.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
