We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this will be a night to untag.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Randomize