either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
