I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize