so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
home. puking in laundry basket.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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