All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
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