i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
She announced her abortion via fbk
Fuck appropriateness.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
