In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I just found a bag of teeth...
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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