I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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