All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
4 words: hood of his car
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
