In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just made out with a guy for $7.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
