Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
honey bunches of taint.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
