Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
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