i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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