I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
