Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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