i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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