Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
