You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
