About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Randomize
