Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Randomize
