I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Randomize