this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
