we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
If I die, sorry about rent.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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