Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
