My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
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