my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Randomize