I heard we made out
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
