Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
