And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
