just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
