we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
You made out with two different species that night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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