and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Im just a social blackout drinker.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.