are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Randomize
