Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.